*One Side at a Time~

[134] Nothing Wrong With Dirty Knees

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 15:06:47 GMT

I prayed a lot yesterday. Not that I don’t pray a lot in general? But yesterday I prayed a lot, a lot. I prayed when I got up for strength. I prayed when they told me I needed blood work for courage. I prayed when I got home for guidance.

Well. That one was oddly funny, actually.

I wiped my tears and had barely sat up in bed when my bedroom door was promptly kicked in to reveal one Colleen Tuttle. Who wanted two water bottles and to know what was wrong and she pulled me off the bed into a hug I didn’t even know I needed. But I was sure glad to get it.

God is not going to walk into my room, poke me in the shoulder and tell me what I should do when I can’t decide for myself. However, it seems he doesn’t mind sending angels to do the dirty work. I don’t appreciate you enough, Leeny. You’re an amazing friend and sometimes you just show up right when I need you most. [Sometimes I don’t realize that I need you most and you still show up]

When I got home from the park with Colleen, I thanked God and I asked for words. Words I found. And then I asked for forgiveness and despite a very dark day there was light.

So as I go through my day today, I will ask for strength and I will ask for courage. I will ask for guidance, and clarity, and forgiveness, and love. I will ask for serenity. Everyone knows I need all of the above.

[132] TYMH@THSMBP Oh Nine 2 Oh Ten

Wed, 20 May 2009 23:47:24 GMT

Starting things out right. Have a good season girls! I love you so much.

'I love you, but you can't have drill next to each other.' -Shannon

'Channel your cat!' -Lindsey

'I'm Abbey, I'll be a freshman, and I don't like Lindsey because...' -Abbey

'I'd do better if I wasn't so focused on hating this song.' -Jackie

'The tree hates you.' -Lindsey

---------------------

[125] with thr3e words, 'it's a girl!' & she looks just like you

Tue, 28 Apr 2009 19:03:36 GMT

Baby Addison Kelly Fraiser Has Arrived on Franklin.
WELCOME HOME!!!

[105] Celebrate The Future [Hand in Hand]

Fri, 29 Aug 2008 16:19:01 GMT

Does anybody want to go ice skating with me? = (
I guess I'll go alone otherwise.

Em

[97] Shades Of Timelessness

Sat, 17 May 2008 01:33:10 GMT

Katie Doyle
I Love You.
Get Better Soon ;__;

[78] Sixteen Years

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 01:31:10 GMT

March 24th, 1992 at 7:35am a baby girl was born with two things. The first: Potential The potential to grow, the potential to learn, the potential to believe, the potential to accept and, above all, the potential to love. The second was hope. Every infant is born with hope. For sixteen years she grew to be what she expected and nothing and yet everything they did. She grew to be brave, she grew to be strong. To be smart and loving and loud and confident. Sixteen years minus one single day.

She was taught to love and be loved and be accepted in a family. A perfect, large family. Every passing day she could see more wholes in what she believed had been perfection. Everyday was a blow to the innocence she believed she possessed.

Escape.

And oh, how she dreamt of it. To be accepted by her own family who considered her too good or not good enough ,depending on the person,; depending on the day. She looked to the future for freedom, but she would never have a large family. A few kids, a niece or nephew if she was lucky, and her parents. No houseful of family on Christmas, no dozen lilies plants in the front window on Easter. It was something that could never be recreated and for the first time, instead of dieing to be allowed the adult-only privilege of sitting in a chair at family gatherings, she simply wished to be alone and away from the shallow, bitter, backwards ways that were the people that were suppose to love her.

Sixteen years minus one single day- three small hours.

On the eve of her sixteenth year she reflected the year and all it had brought. The things she had learned and pulled from life, the things that she had tucked in her mind, the pictures she had taken to capture her past.

Alive.

To feel alive and to be alive were two separate things. She felt alive, and she could see the emptiness all around her. Hadn’t they heard the good news?

He has risen!
He has risen, indeed.

On this the eve of her sixteenth year ,on the night of Easter, the anniversary of her salvation. How could she possibly sob tears of grief when she deserved so fully to dance in praise and joy?

Hypocrites.

Sixteen years minus one single day.

One hundred years on Earth - Fifteen crossed off and one more come morning.

Sixteen years minus one single day she knew- they could not destroy hope. Nothing is destroyed, it merely takes different shape, form, substance.

Hope became Truth.

Just because it wasn’t by them, didn’t mean she wasn’t loved. She was loved. Surrounded by her chosen family. The people she surrounded herself with. The people she adored.

Infants are born with hope. They are born with the potential to learn truth.

And Love is the Truth

[67]

Sun, 23 Dec 2007 17:18:53 GMT

HEY

Anyone know where Jeni is??

Call me if you do: 1-313-7016702

And Jeni? You better call me or Kat or both if you get this before someone else gets to you. We're worried about you. We love you.

Love,
Em

Thanks everyone

[65] Have you ever been low?

Tue, 11 Dec 2007 03:10:01 GMT

I think I’m more sad than anything. I'm disapointed in you. Because I’m confused. I bend over backwards on beds of nails to make sure you’re safe. Happy. Cared for. Loved. And I do it without complaint. Not a word. Even when we’re fighting, even when I’m mad at you. Friends are friends first, fighting can take a backseat to important things. When we’re not busy we can fight. Important things about friendship come first.

I threw you a surprise birthday party a month before your actual birthday so you’d be home for it; so our friends would be there. In doing so I gave up a family beach trip because you were more important.

I walked the streets at eleven at night to get you from your house because you were scared. It was cold and I was sick.

I ditched a party that I had been looking forward to all year because you were upset and needed a shoulder for the night. So we slept in the basement and had a two day long movie marathon.

I joined the musical so we could hang out more, and you went around calling me an arrogant diva.

I stepped in an uncountable amount of times so you and Katie wouldn’t fight. Or stop fighting. It caused me and Kat to fight because I was defending you.

I gave up staying with a group of friends at band camp because we had planned to room together. You ditched me for flutes. Even though I was mad I never held it against you. That’s what friends do.

I spent all of Saturday waiting for you to call instead of going out with some other friends, because I promised I’d clear my schedule so we could work on our project. You never called.

I bite my tongue when you get self-centered, because maybe, just maybe, it’ll make your life a little easier. A little better.

I pray for you and cry for you at night because I know it all can’t be easy. I worry myself sick. Because that’s what friends do.

It makes me want to vomit. Maybe it wouldn’t have been a big deal if it was one story. One idea. Maybe if you gave me some credit, or asked. You know I’d have said yes. Maybe I would have just let it go. Six. Six stories that I worked up to over 5 years of long nights, serious creative breakdowns, writer’s block, bad reviews, low hits, lectures, editing, tears, broken pens and trial and error. Writing is the one thing I can be so proud of. I can do anything, because I think, I make myself believe, that I can actually do anything I try. Because I want to. But writing is the one thing that I can hold up and say ‘I did this. I worked at this. I cried over and sweated over and found inspiration and meaning in this and it’s mine.’ Maybe if it wasn’t done out of anger, or jealousy. My life’s not so perfect. It’s only as good as it is because I work my ass off to make it this good. I don’t get jealous, because if I want it, I make it happen. You can lie, and you can cheat and I’ll laugh it off. Without a second thought or a fleeting glance. Stealing is different. Stealing is a whole other world. You stole more than my words. You stole my work, my dedication. You stole my creativity. You stole my trust in you. I don’t trust easy. Not anyone.

If it was attention you wanted, that you needed, all you had to do was ask. Never have I not dropped everything at anytime to give you my full attention because you just needed it. Because you were suppose to be my friend.

So this is the last thing I’ll say about it. I don’t want your boo-hooing and pitiful me stories. I don’t want how hard your life is. This is what I think, and now I’m letting go. It’s attention that you want, and this is exactly the end of my attention. I’m not after retaliation; revenge. I’m not after anything. I don’t even care if you took the time to read this. I didn’t even put your name on here. You know who you are and that’s enough. I’ve wiped my hands of this whole ordeal and I hope you have too. I hope next time your fingers twinge with the idea to plagiarize you think again.

Nobody likes a thief.

[57] If I die before I wake...

Wed, 26 Sep 2007 21:23:43 GMT

If you died tomorrow, what would you want to tell people today? Pick five people from your friends list and tell them now. Be blunt and let people know how you really feel about them.
Wow.. Here goes. In no particular order. I only have four though. You’re the people I hold the closest and the ones that will read this.
Katie~
Kat,
There is so much I could say to you. You’ve so quickly and utterly stolen my heart. I’ve never met anyone like you. No one is as honest to me as you, and no one has ever held me in such high regards. You put up with my drama, and my problems, and my whining, and my excitement; you force me to think, to create, to become and to deal with things I try to hide from. You’re my reality check, everyday, twice a day. You saved my life one night, and I don’t know if I ever told you that. I know we’ve fought sometimes, and I know we’ve been mad at each other and had fights over ridiculous things, but you’ve really been my best friend no matter what. I can honestly say that while I may love the girls just as much as I love you, I’ve never trusted anyone as much as I trust you. I know I can tell you absolutely everything and I know that you’ll tell me exactly what I need to hear, even if it’s not what I want to hear. I think your overdramatic, and stubborn, and rude, and obnoxious and immature at times…. But I also know you’re loving, kind, intelligent, creative, loyal and amazing all of the time and I love you no matter what. Thank you for being there for me. I don’t know where I’d be if I hadn’t met you.
Jenn~
Jeni,
My ESP, theory, commentating twin. You’ve pushed my writing to more than I ever dreamed. More than that, you’ve pushed me to be more than I ever dreamed. The Emily you met was timid, lonely, afraid, and desperate to find something she was good at. Five years later, I’ve counted on you and shared with you and become a strong, confident person. Not to mention I have you as a friend, and I couldn’t ask for anything more than that. You’re so amazing sometimes I wonder what I did to deserve you as a friend. I was so terrified that if you went off to college you’d forget about the younger girl who blasted CMT and commentated on BONES and House with you. I think you worry to much, and it’s not good for you. I think you care about people so much, even if you say you’re so uncaring and whatever, that it actually hurts you. You can’t save the world; having mental breakdowns is my job. I know I’m immature, and I blow things out of proportion, and I worry too much as well but you know how to make something bad about me look … useful. You always see the best in me, no matter what you say about me. I love writing with you; I feel the creativity in my blood when we’re bouncing ideas around and throwing theories and just thinking of crazy ideas. You’ve taught me so much without even know it. I love you so much and I don’t know what I’d do without you. You gave me the courage to write what’s in my heart; what I want, and not what others want to read from me. It’s given me such an out, such freedom. I owe most of that, if not all of it, to you.
Tina~
Kins,
You’re insane and annoying and aggravating and overdramatic and some days I just want to throttle you. You’re horrible at helping me with breakdowns and your grammar Nazi-ness makes me want to kill you. I’ve also never had a better friend. You make me laugh so hard. I fought it for as long as I could, but you just won me over and wouldn’t take no for an answer. You’re an amazing person, and a great friend and I adore you with so much more than just my heart. Writing with you is hilarious and we’re so fun together. You’ve been there for me since pre-major Nick breakup and after it and in between everything else. Some of my best memories were on your basement floor at eleven at night, or outside on your corner. I think you should join guard, by the way. You’re a truly great person. I hate your family (not your brother though!) and everyday I pray that things will get better for you. You have no idea how many times I’ve asked to adopt you. You take everything in so much stride, I wish I could be like you sometimes. You’re going to go so far and I hope you won’t forget me- That crazy blonde with wide-open blue eyes looking for her next drabble topic. You’ve helped shape who I am, you made me break out of my quiet shell and made me loud and obnoxious and brave. You made my brave. I’m a better person because I knew you. I love you, Tina.
Madeline~
Melania,
Sometimes I hate you. Sometimes I’m so jealous of you I cry. Sometimes I don’t know why we’re friends, and then you look at me and I can hear what you’re thinking and I remember. I love you because you’re my sister, because you’re my friend, because you’re the other half of my soul. I love you because you know what I’m thinking and no matter what I say that sounds crazy you help me through it. Because at 3 in the morning you held me while I cried about losing everything. You helped me find myself when I was so lost I couldn’t even remember who I was anymore. You showed me that just because I don’t have Nick, doesn’t mean I’m strong, and just because I cry he’s gone doesn’t make me weak. I love you for telling me the truth even when it hurts, and only being mad at me for an hour when I tried to strangle you out in front of the school. I adore you. For teaching me how to change my eyes, and how to love the Fall. Thank you for keeping me in one piece when I could barely see light anymore. For playing dress up on New Years Eve and letting me blackmail you with the pictures. For not dating any of my ex-boyfriends, no matter how you felt about them. Every time you sing you sing to my soul. You’re so beautiful and so graceful and truly the half that I wish I was. You know I’d give up anything for your happiness. You’re a star, a gem, a blessing. I thank God for you every time you roll your eyes, every time you break out in song, every time you laugh. Sometimes you’re the only one that understands what’s going on in my head because you’re so deeply rooted in my mind it’s like we share one. The first time I met you I knew we were meant to be sisters. You made me believe in magic again. You made me believe in love again. I’m not perfect, but we are.

More quotes

Thu, 13 Sep 2007 01:56:19 GMT

Gasp a real cut!!!

http://crystal-facets.livejournal.com/15820.html

[54] Things You Might Hear In THSMB Practice

Thu, 23 Aug 2007 18:39:28 GMT

"Noah, build me an arc." -Frank

"There's a birthday coming up three days ago." -Mr. K

"Are you listening, or just spreadding sunshine?" -Frank
_________________
*sung to the tune of ‘Golden Lady’* “FLAMING BABIES!” -Mr. K

*Raises arms and flails* “It’s like cedar point!” -Mr. French

“We gave Tommy a whistle and rose ten points. The crowd loves this kind of crap.” -Mr. K

“Just be JJ with it.” -Mr. K

“You need to be blacker.” -Kassie

“I have a crush on you, Paige.” -Mr. K

“I’ve always wanted to release flaming birds…” -Mr. K

______________________

"Trying is the first step to failure." -JJ

"I'll never try! Then I'll never fail!" -Mike K

"Hiaku time!" -Mr. K

"Trenton Marching Band Outside.... Marching Around Alot....And doing really cool stuff....YEAH!" -Mr. K

"The beat doctor is your master. Obey." -Frank

"And since none of you will see me tomorrow because I'm getting fired...." -Frank
_____________
"Wyndotte town fanfair! AKA WTF!!!!" -Mr K

"No grab ass." -Mr K

"ooooww Pillow talk." -Mr K

::raises arms and flails:: -Mr K

"You're all awesome!" -Shannon

"Yeah, we took best guard like, three out of two times or something according to our medals." -Mr K

__________
"I want someone's baby to cry at this part!" -Mr K

"The I-Love-Tina Frolic."-Rachel

''Em has demonstrated the rape-hug.'' -Rachel

''Secret Stalker.'' -Shannon

''Now over in clarinet world...'' -Frank

''All she ate were meatballs!'' -Shannon

''She made us lock the window of our 27th floor room so Spiderman wouldn't get us!'' -Lindsay

''This one has no tam!'' -Lindsay

"If it has no tam, it's just a marine." -Rachel
____________________

"You said you wouldn't make anymore blind jokes." -Emily

"You look like Hellen Keller."-Shannon

"Hellen keller this part; don't look at it when you unclip it." -Shannon

"You look like Stevie Wonder." -Shannon

"You deserve a slurpee for that." -Ashley

"I will fire you all from segment two." -Frank

"Play it, don't bop it." -Mr. K

"Bop it I said!" -Mr. K

"Why aren't you playing?" -Mr. K

"This isn't a contest to see who can play the shortest note." -Frank

"Do It before I kill you all." -Frank

"I want to buy them so I can threaten people with them." -Lindsay
_____________________
"Thunderous applause, people setting their hair on fire, all sorts of crazy things. Lincoln Parks wishes they were you guys." -Mr. K
__________
"It's scary when Lindsay gets angry in time." -Paige

"Make this a seductive 7 8... I don't know what I'm talking about. Just do it." -Shannon

"It's unsafe to be in this lightning... ok one more run and then it's unsafe." -Shannon

"It's going to storm! Where's Noah?" -Ashley

"Somebody look at how good Em's legs look in these boots." -Ashely

"Paige looks like a rodeo hooker." -Rachel

"Rachel hike that skirt up higher. It's too long." -Shannon

"Who's the rodeo hooker now?!" -Paige

"Ok, now she just looks like Mrs. Claus." -Lindsay
________
"Flutes, until you can play it, you're fired from that part of the music." -Frank

"You have hair in a bag." -Frank

"Don't make me refire you." -Frank

"Jazz running is like house cleaning." -Desi

"When we nail this, this part will be so good people will be giving birth in the stands." -Shannon
_____________
"Girls have a whole chain of thoughts that they think about all the time, one after another. Guys are like - cheese. One thought, then silence." -Mr. K
_________
"The set where I poke you in the boob almost every time." -Ash

"Does anyone see a hash?!" -Shannon

"The flag just attacked Emily! It attacked her!" -Shannon

"Looks a little woogily." -Mr. K

"You're not dumb, the ripple looks dumb." -Shannon

"Drumline has normal sized spacing.. it varies." -Frank

"Be rocks, not rock heads." -Frank
________
“Wrong! My page flipped while I was speaking.” -Frank

“Musical violence!” -Frank

“Mental s-hups.” -Mr. K

“Sorry for wasting twenty-two seconds of your life." -Mr. K

“Get off the chair, Erin. You’ve been de-drum majored.” -Mr. K

[Sung] “We’re passing-through your section!” -Lindsay

“I’m going to assume you’re all smart individuals.” -Frank

“There’s a minor leage baseball team called the ‘woobies’, Isn’t that awesome?” -Mr. K

“That’s not innocent, It’s dead.” -Abby

“Spider Frank.” -Altos

“That’s lineish.” -Drum line

“I have too many blind jokes.” -Shannon

“I’ll give it back, I just wanted to punch it.” -Shannon

“Part my hair with your volume!” -Frank

“Wave to the helicopter.” -Mr. K

“I have a problem!” -Shannon

“They’re already jealous of you, don’t make them less jealous because you’re.. Just shut up.” -Mark

“Somebody out perform Emily!” -Shannon

“The drum majors are never wrong, even if they are.” -JJ

“Altos, do your pimp walk.” -Mark

"5,6,5,6,13,14,15,16." -Shannon

"Do it again because I suck at life." -Lindsay

"Let's make it even more amazinger." -Shannon

"You just cha-chaed it." -Shannon

"Yeah well, my skirts are writing their own work!" -Lindsay

"Stevie Wonder was from Detoit, not downriver." -Shannon

"We're so pasty-Michigan-white, we could all just paint a blue stripe down our legs and go naked. No one would know the diffrence." -Mr. K

I'll keep adding as they keep making me laugh.

For Every Long Lost Dream~

Tue, 06 Feb 2007 22:46:46 GMT

Life is fragile, and unstable. There is nothing you can do to change it. There is nothing anyone can do to change it. In a second everything you know, and everyone you love can be changed. With death there is life, with life there is death. Life isn’t about worrying about death though. It’s about spending way to much time making fun of the name ‘sprinkles’, it’s staying on the phone with your best friend until 3am talking about the thunderstorm, it’s kissing in the snow because you’re freezing to death. It’s not what you have in your life, or even what you do. It’s the people you love, and the people who love you. It’s human-interaction, human-contact. It’s knowing at any second everything could change. Normal will never be normal again. We’ll find a new sense of ‘normal’. We’ll move on, we won’t forget, but we WILL keep living. The world refuses to stop, it refuses to acknowledge that where there once was a life, there will now be a hole in someone else’s life. ‘Closure’ is an empty word. You will never ‘get over’ the loss of a friend. You will however, keep living. Life is unstable, unsure, and limited. It is the longest thing you will ever do, and it will always seem to brief, to short lived. You will always want ‘one more chance’ to say goodbye. Life is cruel and unforgiving, but it is also beautiful and understanding. At any point in time, there is someone else in your life who you can call at any hour of the day, or night for that matter. At any point in time, you may cry a thousand tears and still not feel better. You will scream, and yell, and maybe even become sick with grief, but the world will take no pity on you. You are not the first, and you are not the last. Friends are people who have stolen our hearts, because they are ‘gone’ doesn’t mean you are without them. You will think of a million memories, and a trillion laughs you shared, and there they will be. Forever. That’s what friendship is. Unlike life, it is not temporary. It is eternal, in life and in death. You will never truly lose your friends.

For Starr.
For Showing Us How Short Life Really Is,
And The Reason We Will Aways Need Our Friends.
In Our Hearts
Forever.